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    Butterfly Hug

    Coping Skills

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    Butterfly Hug

    The Butterfly Hug (also called the Hug of Self-Love) is a self-soothing technique that uses bilateral stimulation—alternating stimulation of both sides of the body—to calm the nervous system. It was developed by Lucina Artigas during her work with trauma survivors.

    This technique is connected to EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) therapy, which uses bilateral stimulation to help process traumatic memories. The Butterfly Hug offers a simple, self-administered version that can be used anytime for calming and self-comfort.

    How to Do the Butterfly Hug

    Step 1: Position

    •Cross your hands over your chest
    •Place fingertips just below your collarbones
    •Interlock thumbs to form the butterfly body
    •Fingers are the butterfly wings

    Step 2: Close eyes

    •Take a slow, deep breath
    •Bring to mind a calm or safe place (optional)

    Step 3: Alternate tapping

    •Tap your hands alternately, left then right
    •Like butterfly wings flapping slowly
    •Maintain a slow, steady rhythm

    Step 4: Breathe and observe

    •Continue slow, deep breathing
    •Notice sensations, thoughts, feelings
    •Continue for 1-5 minutes or until calm

    Why It Works

    The science of bilateral stimulation:

    • Engages both hemispheres – Alternating stimulation activates both sides of the brain

    • Mimics REM sleep – Similar to the eye movements during dream sleep that process emotions

    • Reduces physiological arousal – Slows heart rate and breathing

    • Activates calm response – Shifts from sympathetic (fight-flight) to parasympathetic (rest-digest)

    • Self-holding provides comfort – Physical self-contact releases oxytocin

    Enhanced version: Visualize a safe place or positive memory while tapping

    When to use the Butterfly Hug:

    •During anxiety or panic
    •After a distressing event or trigger
    •Before sleep to calm the mind
    •During flashbacks or intrusive memories
    •When feeling overwhelmed
    •As part of a grounding routine
    •Anytime you need self-soothing

    Tips for effectiveness:

    •Keep the tapping slow and rhythmic (like a calm heartbeat)
    •Breathe slowly and deeply throughout
    •You can tap with palms instead of fingertips
    •Works well combined with a safe place visualization
    •Can be done discreetly (crossed arms, gentle movement)
    •Practice when calm so it becomes automatic in distress
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