Internal Family Systems (IFS)
Step by Step Instructions
Difficulty
Intermediate
Duration
5 min - hours
Avg Change
+8.0/s
Rating
5.0
Internal Family Systems (IFS)
A transformative therapy that works with the multiplicity of the mind, helping you understand and heal your inner "parts" while accessing your core Self. Read a more in-depth explanation to understand IFS here.
Benefits
- Heals wounded inner parts compassionately
- Reduces internal conflict
- Accesses inner wisdom and Self-leadership
- Effective healing technique
Why This Works
- This method teaches people to be nonjudgmental towards the wounded aspects of themselves and to be compassionate towards themselves.
- It engages and uses the subconscious mind to heal.
- Add bilateral stimulation to increase effectiveness. You can read more on how to do bilateral stimulation here.
Important Considerations
- IFS says that we all have a self, the part of us that is healed and is the core of who we are, that we can access to help us facilitate our own healing.
- There are three primary roles that a part of ourselves can take besides being the self. The Exile is the parts of ourselves that have been hurt and that we repress. The Manager is the one that controls the exile and silences them so that a person can continue to function. The Firefighter is the part that distracts and acts out when the manager fails to control the Exile typically exhibited by substance abuse, self harm, addiction, dissociation, sexual risk taking, etc.
- Every once in a while using this method I've encountered another part that IFS does not include which I call the Guide. It's a part of the self that is there to support you or help you as you go through this process.
- The goal of IFS is to allow the self to talk to the exiled part and get it to release the hurt it's holding within itself. This is accomplished by getting the manager and firefighter parts on board with allowing this to happen. Trying to talk to the Exiled part without the permission of the other parts not only doesn't work, but results in increased distress.
- This theory uses the body to identify where wounded parts are kept. Wherever the body is distressed is where a wounded part is that needs to be healed.
- This theory uses the subconscious mind to get answers. Do not attempt to answer with your conscious mind because that defeats the purpose of this theory.
- The subconscious is always assumed to be trying to help you rather than hurt you. Approach all parts with this understanding. They are not your enemy, they are just misguided sometimes.
Proven Practice
Step-by-Step Instructions
Measured Efficacy
+8.0
Avg Change / Session
1
Sessions Measured
5.0
2 Ratings
Speed
- 1Identify what you want to work on and check your body's reactivity to identify where that wound is being physically stored in the body.
- 2Ask the subconscious to turn the wounded part into an image to communicate with. It doesn't matter what the image is, just go with whatever comes up. If no image comes up then use the body's reaction to infer answers with an increase in intensity of a physical sensation indicating that the subconscious is not on board and a decrease in intensity of the physical sensation indicating that it is on board.
- 3Ask what age the part is. If the age is higher than 12 there is a good chance that you are talking to a protector part (Manager or Firefighter). If the part doesn't know what age it is that means that the part is fused to your self and doesn't know that it's separate. Ask it to separate from your self.
- 4Ask the part if it's protecting another part. If yes, ask if that part is willing to let you talk to the part it's protecting. If yes, continue to step 6. If no, continue to step 5. If it's not protecting another part, continue to step 7.
- 5If the protector part does not allow you to talk to the Exile part try these two things: 1) Ask what would help it feel more comfortable in this moment to allow you to talk to the hurt part. Do whatever it asks metaphorically in your mind. 2) Ask the part if it would rather do something else other than its current job. If yes (which it basically always says yes), ask it if it's willing to take part in an experiment to see if you can't help it do what it wants and if the experiment doesn't work, it can go right back to doing its job.
- 6Ask again if there are any protector parts currently protecting the exile. Once all protector parts are on board with you talking to the hurt part, repeat steps 2 and 3.
- 7Ask the hurt part how it's trying to protect you. Ask if it's willing to transfer that responsibility over to you or if it's willing to release what it's holding on to (the same question just phrased differently). If yes, continue to step 9. If no, continue to step 8.
- 8There are a couple things you can try to get the Exile part on board: 1) Ask what you can do in this moment to help it feel comfortable transferring its emotional responsibility to you and do what it says metaphorically in your head. 2) If there is a strong emotional block you can ask that emotion, or part, to separate metaphorically so that you can talk to that blocked part on its own. Get its cooperation and continue. 3) Ask the part if it would rather do something else other than its current job. If yes (which it basically always says yes), ask it if it's willing to take part in an experiment to see if you can't help it do what it wants and if the experiment doesn't work, it can go right back to doing its job. 4) Dialogue with the part until you get its cooperation. Remember that you do not get cooperation by force, you get it by being compassionate and understanding.
- 9Ask it to release all negative emotions it's holding on to.
- 10Ask it to replace all negative emotions it just released with positive emotions, whatever that part wants to take into itself.
5.0
2 ratings
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